Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Asshole Odds, Part One

Yet another debut of yet another regular thefridayforty.com feature: Asshole Odds. Herein, we list our favorite offensive behaviors, and the approximate odds that partaking in these activities makes you an asshole. Enjoy! (Asshole.)

Spelling it "kewl." 6:1
Being incredibly muscular only from the waist up. 10:1
Purchasing "G n' R Lies" on iTunes 4:1
Beginning a clause with "the reason being is that..." 15:1
Owning a Juicy Couture sweatsuit 3:1
Saying "bowm-chicka-BOWM-bowm" 4:1
Knowing Festivus details 8:1
Killing your brother with your low, low mattress prices 2:1
Really loving when Moe goes "whaaaaa?" 10:1
Quoting movies on a regular basis. 20:1
Making it a really big deal when somebody hasn't seen the movie you've just quoted 5:1
Actually lisping when you do an impression of a gay man 1:1
Being one of the Queer Eye "Fab Five" 1:1

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